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Not Another New Year's Resolution....

Warning! do not read this if you have already made new years resolutions for 2022 and don't want to question them now because you know 100% that you will follow through with everything! Disclaimer! I do not take any responsibility for the changes you make from reading this post. That's all up to you!

Ok now that that has been said, I was just thinking about new year's resolutions, as you do at this time of the year, and I thought that I might try something different this year. Recently I read a book called "The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck" by Mark Manson (to be honest I only listened to the audiobook because I couldn't be F*cked reading it!) anyway, I came across a novel idea.

Mark explains how often when we send a request out into the universe to change something about ourselves like what we do on NYE, there is often an innate flip side to the message, a dark shadow that appears on its underbelly, showing our vulnerable desire for approval. Unconsciously we shoot ourselves in the foot, and push away the very thing we so very much desire. By reinforcing a message of lack, we desperately request for our dreams to be fulfilled only to experience a never-ending self fulfilling prophecy, where the more we chase it, the more it seems to slip away from us, like a carrot at the end of a stick. Sound familiar?

So it got me thinking what would happen if I tried something different this year? What would happen if I did the complete opposite, and in that quiet moment when the clock strikes 12, instead of wishing for change maybe I could make a different resolution. I Imagine saying something like this to my slightly inebriated self:

Is it not a miracle that at this exact moment in time, on this exact place where I stand, having made all the millions of choices I have made this year, from all the millions of options that I could have chosen from, I have somehow arrived in this exact experience, where I have everything that I could possibly need, and every bit of knowledge that I could possibly need to know, to prepare me for the year to come? And because of this realisation is it possible to understand that I am perfect in every way, just the way I am, warts and all, even if I make the occasional mistake? And as I travel through the next year making millions of more choices from options I have not even begun to understand yet, I hereby declare that my perfection will travel with me, as I boldly take each step into my future, learning from each experience in the past, and not knowing what version of myself I will have the pleasure of meeting each day.

(or something to that effect).

I wonder what would happen then? I have a feeling that something quite magical may start to happen. A good feeling may appear, maybe a feeling that everything is going to be ok. That its all going to work out fine. Very slowly at first (after I recover from my hangover) a little bit of movement may begin, and then some more, and before long some momentum will gather until you find yourself...…well...…different. People may notice a change in you, a quiet confidence, as you start to kick goals that you didn’t even know were there. You may even be motivated to try new things and bring some changes into your life, without very much effort at all, just because it felt right.

Now hang on a second, I know what you're thinking, this all sounds too good to be true. I just do nothing and all my dreams come true? Well, not really. I'm not advocating sitting on the couch for days on end waiting for a sign and letting the world pass you by, because I have been there too, and I know it gets really boring and really depressing after a while. But maybe I finish this little story by describing it this way, using an analogy I picked up somewhere along the way. Imagine your travelling on a small but sturdy, and well decorated sailing boat. You are sailing (thanks Rod) on a vast ocean with many different directions you could travel. All you have to do is pick a direction and fearlessly steer your small boat forward. Some days there will be dark story nights with waves as big as twelve story buildings, and other times clear skies and calm seas will prevail. Whatever conditions get thrown at you along the way I challenge you this year, when making your new year's resolution to look to the skies, take comfort in the thought that you are exactly where you need to be, then choose a direction and set sail!

If you have enjoyed reading this blog and would like to explore some of these concepts further why not book a counselling session with me in 2022? Send me an email on or give me a call on 0481 303 372 and we can book a time to arrange an online or face to face session. I wish you all the best during this holiday season.

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